Speaking of pain, I’ve been dog sitting for the past week in another location and I woke up with a very sore shoulder and my leg has been hurting and now my foot, so I have given myself the okay to take a break from walking. I am very sore today as well! But truthfully, it seems like I deal with some sort of pain since December. Dog sitting is always going on in the background along with my full-time job and I have chalked it up to that. Who knows?!
It's great to read your latest words here this morning. We've been going through a hot spell here in Toronto lately. Hopefully our summer won't be as hot as it was last year as it wrecked hell out of our lawn, regardless of how often it was watered.
You write: "I’m a firm believer that movement is one of the best healing tools we have".
Our daughter firmly agrees. Her favourite motto is "Motion is lotion".
As we all get older we all tend to get those aches and pains in life at times - sometimes physical, other times mental. Often both at the same time but with perseverance we get over them, eh?
Hope you're having a great day and we'll chat again here again soon. Take care my friend.
"...sometimes physical, other times mental." That's a good point, friend! Hope you're doing well too, and that it cools down a bit! Maybe send a few degrees over to us? 🙃
So glad you are feeling better Cait! Pain is brutal to cope with. I have sent your linked video to my partner who is currently dealing with a siactic nerve flare up and hoping this will help him too! I am so sad to hear of the loss of the baby birds. Like you, I have found the one for me and his love of wildlife is also moving. It took him two days to recover from the loss of a baby bird he thought he was nursing back to health. As for a Canadian tradition the one of course that comes to mind immediately is Tim Hortons and a donut. I thought it was very fun that they created world cup timbit flavours! My home away from home is the pool! Outdoor swimming starts next weekend! I just can't wait! I hope you can celebrate the kind cashier before he leaves. Dementia is so cruel and I know your kindness won't be forgotten!🍀🍀🥰🥰🎉🎉
I agree Michelle. My daily early morning stroll over to my neighbourhood Tims for a coffee (but skipping the donut, so as to maintain my - ahem ... - "stylish figure") is my Canadian tradition as well. 😏
Thank you for sharing the story about your partner, Michelle! Sounds like you two have definitely found the right partners in each other ☺️ I hadn't quite thought about Tim's, maybe because I know *not everyone* goes there. But it's a very Canadian thing to do, you're right about that! My aunt and uncles brought Tim's over a few times when I was home! And I should've known it was the pool for you! Excited for you that outdoor swimming opens up soon, woo woo!
"What is your Third Place?" is such an important question, thank you! One of my Third Places is dance, these days my salsa group. Another is the book festival circuit: especially in summer, I see all my author and reader friends and also do business at a series of moveable feast book festivals in the UK and US. And lately, another Third Place is Substack! It's different from other social media that way.
Haha, that's amazing. Well, I'll wave to you from the North of England! My partner is Scottish, and there's definitely a longing to move back up one day...
Cait, you’ve given me a great question to ponder and reflect on.
Right now, I do not have a third place and I am missing this place/people holder in my life. I’ve had incredible third places in my life previously and know what a blessing and effort it is to cultivate these places for ourselves.
We’ve recently moved town in the last month so I’m certainly in the beginning stages of experimenting with places, but if I’m being honest with myself, I haven’t made this effort to cultivate a third place since 2020. And I am missing these connections desperately! Thanks for inspiring a fun experiment to begin this summer as we settle into our new (tiny) town.
Ok well I love that you're thinking of taking this on as a little experiment to start this summer, Ashley! And I hope you're happy with the move you just made! I'm wondering what kinds of places you might consider trying out!? If I think about this now, I have the coffee shop (where I still try to go every week or two) and also the library!? That one took longer, but was simply a result of being a regular visitor. Now everyone there knows my name, which feels so lovely. I'd love to find something else though... maybe a gym class or something... that'll be on my radar too! Good luck with your search, I'd love to hear what you find ☺️
The library is such a great idea! This was my first stop in town within a few days of moving. And I’ve since learned that the library calls me when a reserved item becomes available so I’ve had the chance to visit with the librarian on multiple occasions without physically going to the library. This is definitely where I will be building community. There are no coffee shops in town and only one small restaurant so I’ve got my eye out for neighboring farms where I could perhaps volunteer. There is a folk school nearby where I have signed up for slew of workshops in the coming months. And I’m hoping to see some regulars as we start visiting the river behind our house. I think my third places may be seasonal for the time being which is a bit interesting to think about.
You're SO right that it takes effort to cultivate, Sylvia! And that's good for me to reflect on too. The coffee shop is my third place because I made the effort to go at least once/week when I was still living in the town (and now I try to drive over every 1-2 weeks). The library is another third (fourth?) place for me, also because I went all the time and engaged in some general chit chat with the ladies who work there. It does take effort, and perhaps some discomfort! And, it's worth it for what happens on the other side ☺️
Cait! I am glad that you are feeling better. My heart broke a little reading about your interactions with the cashier. Dementia is such a terrible disease. Your connections to living beings is so delightful to read.
My third places are the library and the art museum. Places for my brain to catch its breath. I do choose to be home more and more. I am trying to figure out if that is age, the state of the world, adjustments after COVID, or a little of it all.
It's a horrendous disease, truly. He seems so stoic/accepting of his reality, to speak with such ease about it... I went and said goodbye to him today ☺️❤️
And that's a good question at the end, friend! I can definitely see it being a little bit of everything! COVID certainly changed how many people operate in this world, and home can be such a comforting place anyway... I've been finding a real longing to be OUT more. But I think that says something about how my home life has changed too, haha.
Oh my gosh, that's such a good idea, Katie... and it might be too late! I went in and said goodbye to him yesterday, knowing I'll be out of town next weekend. I MIGHT be able to get in on the Sunday... anyway, thank you for the idea!
My name is Tina and I live in Ottawa Ontario. Because Canada is so large and so culturally diverse it’s hard to pinpoint rituals. My mother was French Canadian Catholic, so many of her family members would attend midnight mass on New Year’s Eve and then have a meal afterwards (there would typically be tortiere and sugar pie). She was the youngest of 14 children (there were 18 but 4 died in infancy). Every time my mother made pie, any leftover dough would be made into tiny popovers filled with jam. These were called “pets de soeurs” (aka nun farts). My father was a Protestant anglophone from Nova Scotia. He was a musician in the Royal Canadian Mounted Police band. The legacy he has left me is an unimaginably large knowledge of almost all music from the turn of the century (1900’s onward). Blues, big band, swing, jazz, bluegrass, quartet, classical, rock and roll, popular…I can go to a military tattoo and I will know the words of every song. My mom liked to dip her toast in sweet molasses. My city has a large population of Lebanese people and I eat a lot of shawarma. Poutine and Montreal-style bagels are a real thing ❤️
Thank you for sharing all of this, Tina, and for painting such a beautiful picture of what rituals (especially around food!) have looked like! Poutine and Montreal-style bagels ARE a thing there, I'm sure! I love poutine, but it's sadly not as widely available, the further west you go... I ate it most often when I was living in Toronto!
I do love your writing Cait. My third place is probably the walk I do from my house most days. It's nothing special, just a country footpath with some old trees - but each tree feels like an old friend as I pass it.
I love reading how your week goes, Cait. It just always feels like such an authentic mix of all the emotions. I’ve had a similar week of ups and downs, of crying for aging people (my parents, in my case), of appreciating when my body can move and allowing it heal when it needs to. I’m so happy you’re starting to get back to your usual pace. I also believe that moving and being outside is good medicine for a lot of things, particularly on providing perspective. It’s my birthday today and pretty soon, I’ll go for a walk in our nearby park and just listen to all the birds sing. Thank you for starting the morning with me!
Ahhh happy, happy birthday, Sorana! Sounds like a lovely way to start the day 🤗 thank YOU for sharing a moment with us! I hope you have whatever kind of day you need/want!
I love this question of a third place. I have no idea what mine is, but I would love to discover one. What I can say is that I feel most connected when I am walking... so maybe my third place is out in the open?! It may be time for a little experiment.
So glad you're feeling better! I'm still learning and meeting other folks in my community here, but for now I'd say my third place is the local library. There's a lovely coffee shop on the first floor and the baristas are super friendly. And a great book selection! What more can you ask?
I think it’s the park.
Speaking of pain, I’ve been dog sitting for the past week in another location and I woke up with a very sore shoulder and my leg has been hurting and now my foot, so I have given myself the okay to take a break from walking. I am very sore today as well! But truthfully, it seems like I deal with some sort of pain since December. Dog sitting is always going on in the background along with my full-time job and I have chalked it up to that. Who knows?!
These day by day write-ups are my favorite!
Hi Cait!
It's great to read your latest words here this morning. We've been going through a hot spell here in Toronto lately. Hopefully our summer won't be as hot as it was last year as it wrecked hell out of our lawn, regardless of how often it was watered.
You write: "I’m a firm believer that movement is one of the best healing tools we have".
Our daughter firmly agrees. Her favourite motto is "Motion is lotion".
As we all get older we all tend to get those aches and pains in life at times - sometimes physical, other times mental. Often both at the same time but with perseverance we get over them, eh?
Hope you're having a great day and we'll chat again here again soon. Take care my friend.
"...sometimes physical, other times mental." That's a good point, friend! Hope you're doing well too, and that it cools down a bit! Maybe send a few degrees over to us? 🙃
Motion is lotion is the best thing I’ve heard in awhile! Thanks for sharing!
So glad you are feeling better Cait! Pain is brutal to cope with. I have sent your linked video to my partner who is currently dealing with a siactic nerve flare up and hoping this will help him too! I am so sad to hear of the loss of the baby birds. Like you, I have found the one for me and his love of wildlife is also moving. It took him two days to recover from the loss of a baby bird he thought he was nursing back to health. As for a Canadian tradition the one of course that comes to mind immediately is Tim Hortons and a donut. I thought it was very fun that they created world cup timbit flavours! My home away from home is the pool! Outdoor swimming starts next weekend! I just can't wait! I hope you can celebrate the kind cashier before he leaves. Dementia is so cruel and I know your kindness won't be forgotten!🍀🍀🥰🥰🎉🎉
I agree Michelle. My daily early morning stroll over to my neighbourhood Tims for a coffee (but skipping the donut, so as to maintain my - ahem ... - "stylish figure") is my Canadian tradition as well. 😏
Thank you for sharing the story about your partner, Michelle! Sounds like you two have definitely found the right partners in each other ☺️ I hadn't quite thought about Tim's, maybe because I know *not everyone* goes there. But it's a very Canadian thing to do, you're right about that! My aunt and uncles brought Tim's over a few times when I was home! And I should've known it was the pool for you! Excited for you that outdoor swimming opens up soon, woo woo!
"What is your Third Place?" is such an important question, thank you! One of my Third Places is dance, these days my salsa group. Another is the book festival circuit: especially in summer, I see all my author and reader friends and also do business at a series of moveable feast book festivals in the UK and US. And lately, another Third Place is Substack! It's different from other social media that way.
That's a great point about Substack, Alexandra! And a salsa group sounds fun! 💃🏼
I love it, but it's pretty hilarious that I'm from LA but I had to come to Scotland to really get into salsa! In LA my dance crowd were swingers.
Haha, that's amazing. Well, I'll wave to you from the North of England! My partner is Scottish, and there's definitely a longing to move back up one day...
Oh, come! I love it here. It’s really a lot like California in just sheer stunning beauty. The weather, not so much…
Cait, you’ve given me a great question to ponder and reflect on.
Right now, I do not have a third place and I am missing this place/people holder in my life. I’ve had incredible third places in my life previously and know what a blessing and effort it is to cultivate these places for ourselves.
We’ve recently moved town in the last month so I’m certainly in the beginning stages of experimenting with places, but if I’m being honest with myself, I haven’t made this effort to cultivate a third place since 2020. And I am missing these connections desperately! Thanks for inspiring a fun experiment to begin this summer as we settle into our new (tiny) town.
Ok well I love that you're thinking of taking this on as a little experiment to start this summer, Ashley! And I hope you're happy with the move you just made! I'm wondering what kinds of places you might consider trying out!? If I think about this now, I have the coffee shop (where I still try to go every week or two) and also the library!? That one took longer, but was simply a result of being a regular visitor. Now everyone there knows my name, which feels so lovely. I'd love to find something else though... maybe a gym class or something... that'll be on my radar too! Good luck with your search, I'd love to hear what you find ☺️
The library is such a great idea! This was my first stop in town within a few days of moving. And I’ve since learned that the library calls me when a reserved item becomes available so I’ve had the chance to visit with the librarian on multiple occasions without physically going to the library. This is definitely where I will be building community. There are no coffee shops in town and only one small restaurant so I’ve got my eye out for neighboring farms where I could perhaps volunteer. There is a folk school nearby where I have signed up for slew of workshops in the coming months. And I’m hoping to see some regulars as we start visiting the river behind our house. I think my third places may be seasonal for the time being which is a bit interesting to think about.
I think what I am considering is the intentionality you have to have to create a third place.
Or at least for me and my introverted self.
In January, an offhanded conversation with an acquaintance, lead me to join a chorus group after 52 years of ‘not singing’.
That one action has lead to an explosion of creativity with watercolors and new music and new interests.
But I actually had to take that first step and join. And then go. And be uncomfortable. And then go back.
You're SO right that it takes effort to cultivate, Sylvia! And that's good for me to reflect on too. The coffee shop is my third place because I made the effort to go at least once/week when I was still living in the town (and now I try to drive over every 1-2 weeks). The library is another third (fourth?) place for me, also because I went all the time and engaged in some general chit chat with the ladies who work there. It does take effort, and perhaps some discomfort! And, it's worth it for what happens on the other side ☺️
Cait! I am glad that you are feeling better. My heart broke a little reading about your interactions with the cashier. Dementia is such a terrible disease. Your connections to living beings is so delightful to read.
My third places are the library and the art museum. Places for my brain to catch its breath. I do choose to be home more and more. I am trying to figure out if that is age, the state of the world, adjustments after COVID, or a little of it all.
Thank you for these posts. I love reading them.
It's a horrendous disease, truly. He seems so stoic/accepting of his reality, to speak with such ease about it... I went and said goodbye to him today ☺️❤️
And that's a good question at the end, friend! I can definitely see it being a little bit of everything! COVID certainly changed how many people operate in this world, and home can be such a comforting place anyway... I've been finding a real longing to be OUT more. But I think that says something about how my home life has changed too, haha.
Love this update! Obviously not that you’ve been poorly, but definitely that you’re on the mend, and had some lovely interactions this week 🥰
Oh, and I’d definitely do a card for Mark, as he can then revisit it on bad memory days and hopefully be uplifted by that xxx
Oh my gosh, that's such a good idea, Katie... and it might be too late! I went in and said goodbye to him yesterday, knowing I'll be out of town next weekend. I MIGHT be able to get in on the Sunday... anyway, thank you for the idea!
If not, then take a card in before the weekend and ask them to pass it on for you. Then if you get there on Sunday, that’s just an added bonus 🥰
My name is Tina and I live in Ottawa Ontario. Because Canada is so large and so culturally diverse it’s hard to pinpoint rituals. My mother was French Canadian Catholic, so many of her family members would attend midnight mass on New Year’s Eve and then have a meal afterwards (there would typically be tortiere and sugar pie). She was the youngest of 14 children (there were 18 but 4 died in infancy). Every time my mother made pie, any leftover dough would be made into tiny popovers filled with jam. These were called “pets de soeurs” (aka nun farts). My father was a Protestant anglophone from Nova Scotia. He was a musician in the Royal Canadian Mounted Police band. The legacy he has left me is an unimaginably large knowledge of almost all music from the turn of the century (1900’s onward). Blues, big band, swing, jazz, bluegrass, quartet, classical, rock and roll, popular…I can go to a military tattoo and I will know the words of every song. My mom liked to dip her toast in sweet molasses. My city has a large population of Lebanese people and I eat a lot of shawarma. Poutine and Montreal-style bagels are a real thing ❤️
Thank you for sharing all of this, Tina, and for painting such a beautiful picture of what rituals (especially around food!) have looked like! Poutine and Montreal-style bagels ARE a thing there, I'm sure! I love poutine, but it's sadly not as widely available, the further west you go... I ate it most often when I was living in Toronto!
I do love your writing Cait. My third place is probably the walk I do from my house most days. It's nothing special, just a country footpath with some old trees - but each tree feels like an old friend as I pass it.
Oh I love that, Louise! I still don't quite feel that way about the paths near my new place, but I remember that feeling in my old town...
I love reading how your week goes, Cait. It just always feels like such an authentic mix of all the emotions. I’ve had a similar week of ups and downs, of crying for aging people (my parents, in my case), of appreciating when my body can move and allowing it heal when it needs to. I’m so happy you’re starting to get back to your usual pace. I also believe that moving and being outside is good medicine for a lot of things, particularly on providing perspective. It’s my birthday today and pretty soon, I’ll go for a walk in our nearby park and just listen to all the birds sing. Thank you for starting the morning with me!
Ahhh happy, happy birthday, Sorana! Sounds like a lovely way to start the day 🤗 thank YOU for sharing a moment with us! I hope you have whatever kind of day you need/want!
Thank you for sharing highlights from your week, Cait. Glad to read that you were able to get back to your writing projects 👏
My third place is my community library; it is my favourite place to study and work especially in the quiet early mornings.
It's beautiful (and maybe shouldn't be surprising!) to see how many people are saying the library is their third place. ❤️
Friend!
So glad to be reading you are feeling better.
I love this question of a third place. I have no idea what mine is, but I would love to discover one. What I can say is that I feel most connected when I am walking... so maybe my third place is out in the open?! It may be time for a little experiment.
🩷🩷🩷
A little experiment! I love that. Maybe you can take note of all the places you frequent, and see how connected you feel to it/the people there...
So glad you're feeling better! I'm still learning and meeting other folks in my community here, but for now I'd say my third place is the local library. There's a lovely coffee shop on the first floor and the baristas are super friendly. And a great book selection! What more can you ask?
I literally could never ask for more than that, haha. Sounds like a dream, friend!