Nope! It doesn't seem to matter if it's that, or takeaway more broadly, or staying in. My best guess is it's simply: do they remember to charge for the alternative milk or not.
I don't go to Starbucks often, but do notice that some locations have signs up saying they offer free alternative milk... and some don't! Who knows why!
Great newsletter this week. I've asked all kinds of questions - techie, trivial, as well as even personal at times - all my life. From the first day that I started to learn computer programming at my first job up until just last night. So, as your Tall Man says: "there is no such thing as a bad question".
The only thing that I tend not to use when shopping though is my debit card. I always use a credit card if possible for many reasons which I won't go into here but which I suggest that you compare the two payment methods to find out and decide for yourself.
As to why your weekly coffee purchase cost tends to vary from week to week I would guess that it's just like any other purchase - supply and demand issues, supply chain issues, supplier issues, tax issues, labour issues, any or all of the above. We tend to price compare when shopping except when convenience and/or buyer loyalty trump everything else.
So enjoy your coffee, my friend. I'm heading out now to go get my Tim Hortons.
Appreciate your comment, friend! Re: the price, I just shared this above but my best guess is that it's a simpler reason than that. I think it has to do with whether they remember to charge for the alternative milk or not. But who knows! Enjoy your coffee ☺️☕
Hi Rob! I think feeling comfortable asking questions takes time. I noticed that my youngest kiddo always asked 10,000 questions. My hubby got uncomfortable when he didn't have all the answers. I don't think that is the point. Sometimes, I ask questions when I need to learn something new. There are other times I ask questions to generate and foster conversations with people. I love question-seeking people!
Well I can understand your hubby's discomfort. I too would feel exhausted if I was asked 10,000 questions and ran out of answers (of any kind) at question # 9,990 !!! 😳
Could be the wholesale price of the coffee going up and down, which it does. Could be fees you're not supposed to notice. Personally I prefer to use cash or card if possible. I will never pay by phone because I'm rotten at all things digital and the gadgets know this and go wrong specially for me.
So sweet! I ldon't use apple pay anymore because my iphone refuses to accept new info...so...there's that! Lol! Scottish! Love! Your life sounds dreamy!💓💓💓🌌🌌🌌🎆🎆🎆🥰🥰🥰
Hi Cait! I really enjoyed today's piece, thank you!
I have a question for you about one thing really resonated with me: "...part over-explaining myself, which is something I’m trying to pay attention to and stop doing (as much), but am still doing most of the time."
I suffer from this affliction, too! I can sometimes notice when I'm doing it, but how, exactly, do you unwind out of it when you realize it, without it getting socially awkward?! Once I realize I'm over-explaining, I tend to start fumbling over my words and explaining that, too! Just curious if you have any tips or tricks in social situations!
Hey Jess! Thank you so much for sharing what's true for you. Your explanation of over-explaining-then fumbling-then over-explaining again definitely resonates... I don't know that I have specific tips, but can only usually share my own experiences. Which is always a bit clumsy! Like, for a long time, I think I just under-talked (great word, right? lol) in social situations. Just didn't say much at all, was more of a fly on the wall, and would give short answers to any questions that were asked. Sometimes, I think I still do this! Even with TM! I listen a lot (good at that) and don't say much. But then I started paying attention to WHEN/WHY I was in the over-explaining situations (probably the only tip I can share is: pay attention!)... and most of the time, it's when I have a NEED that I want to be met. And asking for needs to be met is challenging, because for most of my life, it REQUIRED an over-explanation. I couldn't just say "hey, I feel X because of Y, can you help me with Z?" I had to come up with a song and dance, for it to even be considered. So I would over-explain because I didn't trust that there are some people who just love you! and want to help you! and want to meet your needs! One day, something I realized is: I AM ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE! I would love to help meet the needs of loved ones, whenever I can. And I try to remind myself of that, before I share something with someone I love now. They love me. And if they can, they will want to help me. And also, if they can't, I trust they will tell me that. No big explanations required from anyone. I don't know if any of this makes sense. Maybe I over-explained it 😉
Thanks for offering some suggestions Cait. Sometimes, I just want people to know what I need through ESP. That way I don't go down the trail of oversharing. It would be much simpler. 🤣
Thank you for asking Jess! I find myself talking faster and faster when I go down this rabbit hole. My cheeks get hot and I need to remove myself from the room quickly.
Loved this piece! It's so great to feel a sense of community. Also, I bet the increase might have been from using Apple Pay if it was a credit card instead of debit? Maybe they have a fee for credit and don't for debit cash? But also it took me about 8 years to start using Apple Pay - I also felt nervous about having payment methods on my phone!
Loved this and how hard it is sometimes to ask simple questions about things we think we 'should' already know.
Also, I think there is a related thing around knowing a dog's name for a year and having no idea what the person's name is and feeling that you are way outside of the grace period for asking someone's name. I've started just saying that out loud when I'm asking for a dog parent's name 3-4+ months after I've meet them.
How this resonated with me! When I moved to the UK nearly 50 years ago, I didn't know how to use the pay phones... When I asked fellow students, they all said the same thing "Dial, LISTEN FOR THE PIPS, and then put your money in. But I kept wondering how I would know what the pips were? What was a pip?!? Eventually, I just gave it a try... and it was obvious what a pip was!
I was totally like you about banking apps... and now I love them! Sometimes you just have to ask questions and give things a try.
It does help him. His left hand doesn’t functionally work and he has limitations with his right hand so pulling out a card from a wallet is hard. Putting it back is harder. Tapping his phone is easy!
I'm celebrating you with this new skill! And in celebrating you, I'm celebrating myself too, because my 43 year-old self *just this month* also committed to learning how to pay with my phone. I've done it three times now, all at the grocery. I still don't consider this specific skill necessary, but I was feeling old and realized I am absolutely determined to not let tech completely outpace me. So I made a commitment to myself to continue engaging with "new" (lol) tech, even when it doesn't seem like it's necessary or even benefiting my life, simply so I can stay engaged. Next up ... passkeys ... 😬
Oh yay you, Hannah! I also love the idea of not wanting tech to outpace you. I think there will be ways where this does happen, simply because there will be apps we choose not to use (me = TikTok!). But how it actually WORKS... there's no reason not to learn!
My hubby refuses to learn how to do simple tasks on his phone. While we were traveling recently, I did all the booking of trains and navigating. I was proud that I knew how to take care of myself. There is something powerful in that.
I'm old enough to be your mum and I still hesitated to ask questions for the risk of sounding ignorant. However, your writing reminds me that we all struggle with things in life that are challenging.
Tall man is right that there are no dumb questions. There is no shame in not knowing how to do something.
Hopefully we are all learning and growing whatever our age. Thanks for writing and helping us on our life's journey.
Lately, I have been trying to learn new tech things. I continue to ask questions, especially using Google. Sometimes it is nice to have an automated response. I feel less silly for not knowing how to do certain things. 🤣
Wonderful to feel safe asking questions :) Where I grew up I could easily step out into the forest and rolling hills for as long as I pleased. It's definitely something that is important to me. We have to move out of our rental next year and now possibility of owning our own home is becoming somewhat real. I'm asking all sorts of questions, questions I had been afraid to ask because it all felt so confusing, scary and private. I feel more safe in myself to ask questions of others regardless of their position and I'm so thankful for that. I do feel like community connection can be anywhere you are. I know multiple people at different shops in different towns when I take my elderly clients shopping. Once I saw my cousin out with her friend while I was shopping with client. I texted her and told her where I was. I watched her read the text look around to see me waving at her. She came over quickly for a hug. It was a short moment but I loved every second of it. The world becomes more friendly when we can take time to treat others with the same kindness we treat our friends, family or any loved ones. I feel like I type too much but another client told me she had made a new friend! This client is 92 and she goes to the same coffee shop for her coffee and donut. Slowly overtime she's been having more conversations with one of the baristas a 21 year old woman who asked to sit with her during her lunch break a few times. At Christmas the barista gave her a card thanking her for her friendship and how thankful she was to have met her. Plus a crochet bouquet of roses she made. Wonderful to share these stories in the light ✨
p.s I also can't seem to remember how to do emojis on here and just copy them hahaha..
HA! Friend, I do the exact same thing with emojis. Open a new tab, type "sparkle emoji", and copy/paste... is there another way!? Who knows! And you can never type too much here! (Unless there's some kind of character limit!?) I'm grateful for your stories. You painted two very sweet pictures. Thank you for sharing ☺️
Thank you for sharing Lia. Sharing our hearts and kindness is a beautiful practice. All the little moments of kindness and gratitude all add up. When my kiddos were little, I took my youngest to a local coffee shop each Friday to have a snack and read while his brother took guitar lessons next door. A German woman cooked him special scones, hot out of the oven each week. Over the years, this became a tradition, allowing us to meet new people and see familiar faces. I cherish those memories, and they remain a special place for me and my family. ❤️ I recently figured out how to add these lovely emojis! 🤣
I still haven’t paid anything with my phone. It doesn’t look likely to change just yet.
I’m a little confused. What do you include in fintech? Isn’t online banking on a website as much fintech as using an app?
It seems wild that only 13% or even 32% use fintech. When I immigrated from France to Canada the online banking systems in Canada seemed more advanced than what I had at home (this was in 2016, so a while ago!).
Online banking wouldn't be considered fintech because all banks should offer that. Fintech would be anything that makes financial stuff more convenient. So mobile banking (apps), investing apps, that kind of thing. Basically, things we can do on our phones! Canada has incredibly strict banking regulations about what companies can create, and a lot of the apps would require you to break your T&C with your bank. So we just don't have access to much there! (A simple example: you'll hear Americans always talk about sending their friends money via apps like Venmo. Canada can't even have an app like that, at the moment.)
Interesting. So if I understand correctly, it would be any banking technology that is convenient but not quite a norm. So online banking might have been considered in that category 20-30 years ago (what is time), but now it's too common.
Thanks for answering! Now I'm less surprised by the percentages you shared.
Way to go, learning something new! I recently got a new phone, and I had to reload all of the apps and information. Immediately, I was irritated when I came across something I didn't know how to do. I am learning to just ask or look it up. Instead of being stuck, I much rather attempt to figure it out. It is empowering once I do learn how to do it. It also helps me continue to ask questions and learn more. Keeps my mind flexible and fluid.
I was literally just wondering how that works. I’ve avoided it forever.
You are definitely not alone!
Aww. I’m not using it either. This has made me curious though. Maybe he charges you less when you bring your own cup? ✨
Nope! It doesn't seem to matter if it's that, or takeaway more broadly, or staying in. My best guess is it's simply: do they remember to charge for the alternative milk or not.
That must be it. I always order the same at our local Starbucks and I’ve tried to clock the price because they never charge me the same. 😂
I don't go to Starbucks often, but do notice that some locations have signs up saying they offer free alternative milk... and some don't! Who knows why!
Hi Cait !
Great newsletter this week. I've asked all kinds of questions - techie, trivial, as well as even personal at times - all my life. From the first day that I started to learn computer programming at my first job up until just last night. So, as your Tall Man says: "there is no such thing as a bad question".
The only thing that I tend not to use when shopping though is my debit card. I always use a credit card if possible for many reasons which I won't go into here but which I suggest that you compare the two payment methods to find out and decide for yourself.
As to why your weekly coffee purchase cost tends to vary from week to week I would guess that it's just like any other purchase - supply and demand issues, supply chain issues, supplier issues, tax issues, labour issues, any or all of the above. We tend to price compare when shopping except when convenience and/or buyer loyalty trump everything else.
So enjoy your coffee, my friend. I'm heading out now to go get my Tim Hortons.
Appreciate your comment, friend! Re: the price, I just shared this above but my best guess is that it's a simpler reason than that. I think it has to do with whether they remember to charge for the alternative milk or not. But who knows! Enjoy your coffee ☺️☕
Hi Rob! I think feeling comfortable asking questions takes time. I noticed that my youngest kiddo always asked 10,000 questions. My hubby got uncomfortable when he didn't have all the answers. I don't think that is the point. Sometimes, I ask questions when I need to learn something new. There are other times I ask questions to generate and foster conversations with people. I love question-seeking people!
Hi Blythe!
Well I can understand your hubby's discomfort. I too would feel exhausted if I was asked 10,000 questions and ran out of answers (of any kind) at question # 9,990 !!! 😳
Could be the wholesale price of the coffee going up and down, which it does. Could be fees you're not supposed to notice. Personally I prefer to use cash or card if possible. I will never pay by phone because I'm rotten at all things digital and the gadgets know this and go wrong specially for me.
Ha, and this is where self-awareness pays off! You know yourself ☺️
So sweet! I ldon't use apple pay anymore because my iphone refuses to accept new info...so...there's that! Lol! Scottish! Love! Your life sounds dreamy!💓💓💓🌌🌌🌌🎆🎆🎆🥰🥰🥰
Hi Cait! I really enjoyed today's piece, thank you!
I have a question for you about one thing really resonated with me: "...part over-explaining myself, which is something I’m trying to pay attention to and stop doing (as much), but am still doing most of the time."
I suffer from this affliction, too! I can sometimes notice when I'm doing it, but how, exactly, do you unwind out of it when you realize it, without it getting socially awkward?! Once I realize I'm over-explaining, I tend to start fumbling over my words and explaining that, too! Just curious if you have any tips or tricks in social situations!
Cheers,
Jess
Hey Jess! Thank you so much for sharing what's true for you. Your explanation of over-explaining-then fumbling-then over-explaining again definitely resonates... I don't know that I have specific tips, but can only usually share my own experiences. Which is always a bit clumsy! Like, for a long time, I think I just under-talked (great word, right? lol) in social situations. Just didn't say much at all, was more of a fly on the wall, and would give short answers to any questions that were asked. Sometimes, I think I still do this! Even with TM! I listen a lot (good at that) and don't say much. But then I started paying attention to WHEN/WHY I was in the over-explaining situations (probably the only tip I can share is: pay attention!)... and most of the time, it's when I have a NEED that I want to be met. And asking for needs to be met is challenging, because for most of my life, it REQUIRED an over-explanation. I couldn't just say "hey, I feel X because of Y, can you help me with Z?" I had to come up with a song and dance, for it to even be considered. So I would over-explain because I didn't trust that there are some people who just love you! and want to help you! and want to meet your needs! One day, something I realized is: I AM ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE! I would love to help meet the needs of loved ones, whenever I can. And I try to remind myself of that, before I share something with someone I love now. They love me. And if they can, they will want to help me. And also, if they can't, I trust they will tell me that. No big explanations required from anyone. I don't know if any of this makes sense. Maybe I over-explained it 😉
Thanks for offering some suggestions Cait. Sometimes, I just want people to know what I need through ESP. That way I don't go down the trail of oversharing. It would be much simpler. 🤣
Thank you for asking Jess! I find myself talking faster and faster when I go down this rabbit hole. My cheeks get hot and I need to remove myself from the room quickly.
Loved this piece! It's so great to feel a sense of community. Also, I bet the increase might have been from using Apple Pay if it was a credit card instead of debit? Maybe they have a fee for credit and don't for debit cash? But also it took me about 8 years to start using Apple Pay - I also felt nervous about having payment methods on my phone!
Good thinking but nope! I never use credit here. So can't be that... 🙃
Loved this and how hard it is sometimes to ask simple questions about things we think we 'should' already know.
Also, I think there is a related thing around knowing a dog's name for a year and having no idea what the person's name is and feeling that you are way outside of the grace period for asking someone's name. I've started just saying that out loud when I'm asking for a dog parent's name 3-4+ months after I've meet them.
Haha, I love this, Rachel! This is me with MANY of the neighbourhood dogs here!
How this resonated with me! When I moved to the UK nearly 50 years ago, I didn't know how to use the pay phones... When I asked fellow students, they all said the same thing "Dial, LISTEN FOR THE PIPS, and then put your money in. But I kept wondering how I would know what the pips were? What was a pip?!? Eventually, I just gave it a try... and it was obvious what a pip was!
I was totally like you about banking apps... and now I love them! Sometimes you just have to ask questions and give things a try.
Now I want to know what the pips sound like! Off to Google... thanks for sharing, friend ☺️
I don’t know how to use Apple Pay. My 73 year old father learned a few years ago when he became disabled.
I am glad you found such a wonderful safe space.
Hi Kristen! Just out of curiosity: is there a correlation there? Does using Apple Pay help him, now that he's disabled? And if so, how? ☺️
It does help him. His left hand doesn’t functionally work and he has limitations with his right hand so pulling out a card from a wallet is hard. Putting it back is harder. Tapping his phone is easy!
I'm celebrating you with this new skill! And in celebrating you, I'm celebrating myself too, because my 43 year-old self *just this month* also committed to learning how to pay with my phone. I've done it three times now, all at the grocery. I still don't consider this specific skill necessary, but I was feeling old and realized I am absolutely determined to not let tech completely outpace me. So I made a commitment to myself to continue engaging with "new" (lol) tech, even when it doesn't seem like it's necessary or even benefiting my life, simply so I can stay engaged. Next up ... passkeys ... 😬
Oh yay you, Hannah! I also love the idea of not wanting tech to outpace you. I think there will be ways where this does happen, simply because there will be apps we choose not to use (me = TikTok!). But how it actually WORKS... there's no reason not to learn!
My hubby refuses to learn how to do simple tasks on his phone. While we were traveling recently, I did all the booking of trains and navigating. I was proud that I knew how to take care of myself. There is something powerful in that.
I'm old enough to be your mum and I still hesitated to ask questions for the risk of sounding ignorant. However, your writing reminds me that we all struggle with things in life that are challenging.
Tall man is right that there are no dumb questions. There is no shame in not knowing how to do something.
Hopefully we are all learning and growing whatever our age. Thanks for writing and helping us on our life's journey.
Lately, I have been trying to learn new tech things. I continue to ask questions, especially using Google. Sometimes it is nice to have an automated response. I feel less silly for not knowing how to do certain things. 🤣
Wonderful to feel safe asking questions :) Where I grew up I could easily step out into the forest and rolling hills for as long as I pleased. It's definitely something that is important to me. We have to move out of our rental next year and now possibility of owning our own home is becoming somewhat real. I'm asking all sorts of questions, questions I had been afraid to ask because it all felt so confusing, scary and private. I feel more safe in myself to ask questions of others regardless of their position and I'm so thankful for that. I do feel like community connection can be anywhere you are. I know multiple people at different shops in different towns when I take my elderly clients shopping. Once I saw my cousin out with her friend while I was shopping with client. I texted her and told her where I was. I watched her read the text look around to see me waving at her. She came over quickly for a hug. It was a short moment but I loved every second of it. The world becomes more friendly when we can take time to treat others with the same kindness we treat our friends, family or any loved ones. I feel like I type too much but another client told me she had made a new friend! This client is 92 and she goes to the same coffee shop for her coffee and donut. Slowly overtime she's been having more conversations with one of the baristas a 21 year old woman who asked to sit with her during her lunch break a few times. At Christmas the barista gave her a card thanking her for her friendship and how thankful she was to have met her. Plus a crochet bouquet of roses she made. Wonderful to share these stories in the light ✨
p.s I also can't seem to remember how to do emojis on here and just copy them hahaha..
HA! Friend, I do the exact same thing with emojis. Open a new tab, type "sparkle emoji", and copy/paste... is there another way!? Who knows! And you can never type too much here! (Unless there's some kind of character limit!?) I'm grateful for your stories. You painted two very sweet pictures. Thank you for sharing ☺️
Thank you for sharing Lia. Sharing our hearts and kindness is a beautiful practice. All the little moments of kindness and gratitude all add up. When my kiddos were little, I took my youngest to a local coffee shop each Friday to have a snack and read while his brother took guitar lessons next door. A German woman cooked him special scones, hot out of the oven each week. Over the years, this became a tradition, allowing us to meet new people and see familiar faces. I cherish those memories, and they remain a special place for me and my family. ❤️ I recently figured out how to add these lovely emojis! 🤣
I dreamt last night about fumbling Apple Pay (minor detail of the dream but nonetheless 😂)
HA! It's anxiety-inducing 😂
I still haven’t paid anything with my phone. It doesn’t look likely to change just yet.
I’m a little confused. What do you include in fintech? Isn’t online banking on a website as much fintech as using an app?
It seems wild that only 13% or even 32% use fintech. When I immigrated from France to Canada the online banking systems in Canada seemed more advanced than what I had at home (this was in 2016, so a while ago!).
Online banking wouldn't be considered fintech because all banks should offer that. Fintech would be anything that makes financial stuff more convenient. So mobile banking (apps), investing apps, that kind of thing. Basically, things we can do on our phones! Canada has incredibly strict banking regulations about what companies can create, and a lot of the apps would require you to break your T&C with your bank. So we just don't have access to much there! (A simple example: you'll hear Americans always talk about sending their friends money via apps like Venmo. Canada can't even have an app like that, at the moment.)
Interesting. So if I understand correctly, it would be any banking technology that is convenient but not quite a norm. So online banking might have been considered in that category 20-30 years ago (what is time), but now it's too common.
Thanks for answering! Now I'm less surprised by the percentages you shared.
You're welcome, friend! And yes, you're right: it all started with online banking! Now, that's "the norm" and expected by consumers.
Way to go, learning something new! I recently got a new phone, and I had to reload all of the apps and information. Immediately, I was irritated when I came across something I didn't know how to do. I am learning to just ask or look it up. Instead of being stuck, I much rather attempt to figure it out. It is empowering once I do learn how to do it. It also helps me continue to ask questions and learn more. Keeps my mind flexible and fluid.